I have no idea where I read this (the magazine page I tore out and plopped into the ‘blog about this someday’ pile doesn’t list the publication’s name) but wherever it was from, it was on page 39 and was something written by Barry Magid, the founder of Ordinary Mind Zendo in New York and the author of Ending the Pursuit of Happiness: A Zen Guide.
Magid writes:
Sitting, first and foremost, is sitting with who we are — what we see in the mirror…
Cherish your questions, but do not chase after answers. Sit still amid your doubt, restlessness, loneliness, and anxiety. They are not obstacles to your practice — they are your practice.
Sometimes I get frustrated with myself when I’m in the midst of a blue period, but this frustration only begets more blue. These words are a good reminder that doubt and loneliness are part of this experience, and that as I practice accepting these uncomfortable feelings, I will be less fixated on chasing happiness. Happiness is not the answer; feeling okay with not necessarily being happy is.
Oh wait! There are no answers! I shouldn’t be chasing after answers any more than I should be chasing after a bigger paycheck, a fancier title, or a nicer office! Duh. =)
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Maybe, then, the journey towards career nirvana is less about figuring out what makes you ‘happy’ in the cracked-out, high-on-delicious-cupcakes, OMG-the-sun-is-on-my-face-and-I-am-laughing-like-a-maniac sort of way. But rather, it’s about stepping into that blissed-out zone where everything is thrumming and resonating in a way that just feels right, that’s free from constant nagging and anxiety, where you are vibing with that person in the mirror and with everyone else around you.
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